Iota #21 - Til the sun is out on Sunday

I was trying to blog since the sun rose this morning… this empty page was all awaited to be jotted. I was kinda busy, yet after all the busy-ness is done, I turn bored. Then I come back to this empty sheet of virtual paper, but couldn't get myself a grip of the keys, yet I'm still wondering if there's anything good I can do to kill the boredom.

And now, til the sun is out, Sunday entry is left undone.

But all the important note I want to keep for today is – I am contented, the house is clean! and I am more delighted to have had clean it without the existence of the other two of my housemates, in which with their existence won't make any difference, but a further annoyed-turned-anguish of their ignorance of our house's hygiene.

This is the most sincere and truthful I can be. I can't wait to miss you when you're gone! I hope I will, yeah maybe, somehow…

Luscious lunch

0600 : The last scene of my dream last night (this morning) was weirdly a gigantic flying whale. Hence, I open my eyes and waken up by the luminosity of the sunlight through the brownish curtains straight sun-drenching my bed.

"Alamak, dah terang!"

Dragging my feet to the windows, bolt the curtains to the edge and staggered by the intense sun light with a dazzling heat right on my face. As if God is mad… as I missed the subuh prayer. *dengan nada penuh kekesalan*

I had no time to waste, this morning has to be a quick one! This room needs an intensive-spring-cleaning session. It's been a week since I left for Kendiri, the luggage was still full of dirty laundry, the clean clothes were still freshly packed in the plastic bags waiting to be arranged in the closet, the bags and handbags were mountaining on the other corner of the room, the book shelves were dusty (nampak sangat dah lama tak baca buku), and this study table was in a disastrous mess!

With only a mug of plain water for breakfast, tuck my hair up and started to sort out my dirty laundry and fold them neatly before dunking them into the laundry bag. First step settled! And so went the next few steps until everything is completely done! Then I can look at my room, breathe, and say "Aaah~".

0730 : One hour left til my lunch date (the lunch date was in Surabaya, a 2-hour drive away), therefore we had to get ready earlier than other Malang people who are probably busy preparing breakfast still.

Boiled some water together with a few rosella buds, chopped an apple and dunk it in a bowl together with some cereals and milk. Thus, those were what I called quick-but-with-little-effort breakfast.

0850 : Frente fetched us from home, and hang-out at her house for some time while waiting for Danny, Icha and Hari from their Sunday-prayer.

1130 : Arrived in Hanamasa. Yay!!!

The steamboat buffet and Japanese grills were awesome! Burpp… Alhamdulillah!

The almost three hour lunch was enough to full-filled our tummies. If we all have the tummy-meter, mine would exceed the 'F' mark. Can't remember the last time I had such big feast after the Buka Puasa Buffet at Tupai-Tupai. If I must mentioned this, my family used to have buka puasa at the hotel in which the foods never looked as mouth-watering as ever since my tummy was at the most insatiable gluttonous state due to fasting, and therefore I would take every each of the food and beverage offered in an immensely large quantity, and by chance finished them all (sebab takut nanti mama marah sebab membazir). Consequently, it would very hard for me to ruku' during Maghrib prayer, and I would stay full til sahur the next morning. And so that was the story on how my stomach gets so elastic that it can turned as big as the dustcart a.k.a garbage truck.

1400 : We moved our asses off to Tunjungan Plaza in two separate cars (we came by one car, thank God Dr.Nevy got her big car for the extra ride). Nothing much happened there, but one thing happened for sure – Starbucks therapy! Aww… pity Frente that she only had to swallowed her much accumulated saliva of just looking as us having our tall cups since she has gastritis and caffeine is definitely a no-no.

1800 : From TP to Galaxy Mall. Nothing much happened either, but enjoying our time of togetherness. Got a few pirated DVDs, some drinks and window shopping!

2200 : Head back to Malang and ready for another day of work….

Thanks Frente for the luscious lunch! May God bless you and may all your wishes come true, amin~

IPD comes to an end

Anelene chocolate tastes too milky. I was never a big fan of chocolate milk, though I do like them, but I always think that white milk tastes more real, fresh and cow-ish! And chocolates are suppose to be chocolaty and rich, not milky (argh macam gay!).

Alhamdulillah, IPD (Ilmu Penyakit Dalam @ medical @ internal) department is finally over!!! For God's sake, I've actually been through the 12 weeks? The longest and so-called-hardest department for internship ever. IPD was hard nonetheless, but it's not fair for me to judge, because I have never been to any other departments yet to allow me to compare.

I wish I could write about all my precious experiences over here, but it's better to be visualized (in mind) rather than spending time arrange them into words.

The first month of IPD was as well my first month of internship. It was the hardest point in my life ever so far. The hardship however has made me learn to live and survive but not to escape. First, I always have an inner-issue with respecting people. 'Respect' doesn't have an absolute meaning, it certainly comes in relatively different quantum or level. I respect people respectively and according because I believe different people deserve a different kind of respect despite of their position, status, title or whatsoever.

I believe in the freedom of speech. In which I don't think is a culture here in this country. For me, yes means yes, and vice versa, and the answer varies according to condition, not just because you stand higher than me, I have to say yes to your orders all the time. We're talking about contributing in teamwork here doctors, not on how obey or disobey you are to your senior/chief/boss's orders.

Then, it comes to the responsibility. Have you ever feel the rigidity of hauling a huge responsibility on your back, sometimes it makes you want to cry? Sometimes it makes you think of taking a break, sometimes it makes you feel like joining your patient on their deathbed and resting in peace, sometimes it even comes running across your mind about quitting, and it is so sickening!

Until my last day in that department, I am still phobia to hear the word 'OB' a.k.a Orang Baru a.k.a new patient. When I see another bed is pulled into my ward and when the nurse says "Mbak koas, ada OB", I still get that punched through my heart. It's not a sigh of refuse, but I feel another weight is added into my workload. I wonder how the residents can handle this situation with much more heavier workload…

At times, I was that selfish… One way to keep me going and give my best is when I think of my family and how I want them to be treated. Imagining my parents being treated by an ignorance, selfish and lazy doctor? Memang kena tumbuk doctor tu!!

And in the end of the day, I realized that the more destitutions that come my way, are perhaps another direction to my dream destiny. New patient means another new experience. They come to bring me more knowledge, even at an expected times. Their perplexity teaches us patience, and when they have to go, we know that at least it's the best for them and it doesn't always mean our failure to treat. And what more, I am by some means closer to God…

Knowledge wise, as I've mentioned on my previous entries, these three months experience teaches more than the three semesters of lectures. For this reason, I don't mind if I have to be working in this department again – MAYBE, nah!!

The best thing about being in IPD is because Frente is in it! I wonder how my life in IPD would be without her around. She, who always accompany me with her hilarious jokes (in which only I can instantly understand) and give me guidance and advices on stuff. We're like high school best friends who do stuff together and talk on stuff like music, boys, gossips and etc, and even joking around like nobody else's business, I miss this kind of people in my circle and she is here now.

The first few weekends we've spent driving to Surabaya just to breathe in different air, the coffee sessions most of the evening when we can 'cabut' early, the study-together for exams while enjoying dinner, the piles of books she borrowed me for my assignments and exams, the girls night on new year in Surabaya, the sleepover on her birthday, the KFC-delivery, Indomie goreng, Roti Boy, nasi padang, Baskin Robins, cakes and éclairs, durians and even Starbucks caramel macchiato all the way from Surabaya, and something we both can never forget was the morning before my lab exam, I appreciate the support and the warm hug (and the story behind it that we shall keep it a secret). You're my God-sent!

Despite of the sweetness and hardness, there are not less of bitterness… I've been through countless, and I've overcome every each of it with my own remedy. Sometimes, if a supervisor/resident is not satisfied with me or and get fumed up, I will tell myself that it's okay, might not be my fault, it's just him/her who is having a PMS or family problem, or just not happy with him/herself that he/she just want to break it to someone else.

And talking about my undone assignment, arrgh! Tak boleh diharap punya groupmates!Empat orang muka tak bersalah, tapi masih hutang 2 responsi! GGRrr!

And again, talking about the happiest moment, is today – On my last day, the two close friends are friends again, and they had a big warm hug. I'm glad because somehow I am mutually part of this miracle. HAPPY BIRTHDAY FRENTE!!!

Perfect addition

Vanilla mint Listerine tastes a bit of vanilla and I bet the vanilla essence will stay in the bathroom til tomorrow morning. Nah, I prefer the orange flavor nonetheless!

Okay, this entry is suppose has nothing to do with the mouthwash – it's just a prologue (cause I don't like cliché foreword, starting from now, I'll try to write a prologue which has no connection with the main entry).

Hey world, I am 24 now. And I don't feel any different, so it doesn't matter if I am 24 or 42 yea? I am still here on my keyboard, blogging and feel like I am still 23, or perhaps 17. Age really make no difference in my current situation right now. I am stuck in this body of a busy lady struggling to pursue her dreams. I've been in this body-of-a-busy-lady ever since I was 19, and it gets busier by time *sigh*.

I was happier than ever by this time last week. Zuffy came to visit. Though it was such a super short visit, but he never failed to make me beyond-super happy. I envy him… how can he always know how to pleased me? Not that I was only pleased, but I was ecstatically in an extra-dosed-endorphins treatment. I never knew if I can ever create any happiness to him just as how he creates mine.

Before I ever know his existence, I thought my life was perfect, though I may not have everything, but I had enough of the best's. I could be the most arrogant person ever and I was the fan of only-myself. My narcissism was at the highest level (so far, at that time). I have the world's best papa and the most wanted mama, and the merriest siblings one could ever ask for. My friends are a bunch of perfect combination of human beings, my family are the most harmony and I was born and breed under the most favorable hometown.

Then came this man – him. Then was when I realized that I've grown up, cause I met a man and fall in love with. He is the best addition to my so-called-already-perfect life. If I used to have sunny days, he would come and bring me a rainbow, if I used to have starry nights, he would make the moonlight shines brighter. How can I not love this combinations, it makes me sip my life juicier and just right.

To this man, I may have told you how much I love you for so many times, but I swear those words were never adequate neither enough to describe how I am truly feel about you. Thank you for always be yourself and be here for me :)

I showed him my favourite coffee parlor, since we don't have Starbucks in Malang, Java Dancer is the best so far...

He always make 31st January my special day among the 365 days in a year.

On Sunday, my only day off-work, we went to Pasar Minggu and had breakfast there. That's Frente with her post-on-call face. Lumayan... masih bisa tersenyum!

We spent hours at the saloon. He had his so-called 'cheap' director cut and a hair spa, while I enjoyed reflexology by the pond and micromist hairspa.

He sent me off to work and we had lunch date at the hospital.

I was very happy to wake up very early every of the morning while he was here, just to had a quick breakfast together!

His favourite is bakso. Well this is definitely not his bowl! Sejak bile plak Zhaf suka makan sayur kan?

When i meet i *hearts*