Iota #14 - Todays Catch

From Surabaya Post :

About our Bakti Sosial Program @ Baksos is on Surabaya Post. Also linked to my previous post.

From The Star :

No Big Deal – I wonder who needs who here… I wonder who is the 'desperado' and who is the 'egoist'. All I can say is that – Like we ever care~ Who needs whose $$ now? We still can b GENEROUS to bangladeshi, philipinos, paki, siamese, tibetan, liberian, siberian. Lalalalaalaa~

From You Tube :

The Saturdays – Work official video. Aww… hot bodies are so motivating!!! Also see 'Just Can't Get Enough'. If I were to have an all girl groupies, I'll have the influence from PCD and The Saturdays and it'll be The Saturdays Dolls (Pussycat is so NO! since I have this one loathing for cats) and we'll have all the hot dance moves with our sexy bodies. Cehh berangan!!!

Kapur Ajaib

No kids, this is not the chalk like Blocky has in the ChalkZone cartoons. Too bad this chalk doesn't make your drawing turn into life. It is 'ajaib' but not that so cartoon-ish magic. It looks exactly like the chalk your teacher used to have in school last time (I believe all schools have changed chalkboard to white/marker board by now), but this chalk is a little bit more special, not just a chalk but it is so ajaib that it can scare ants and roaches off!!!

I hate ants! One of the pest that annoys me the most must be ants! Ants are the least useful a.k.a useless creatures alive (oh I must not say this, as Allah creates every creatures to have their own unique-ness, though I haven't found the uniqueness in ants yet).

Anyway, since I sometimes have my coffee mug overnight on the study desk and that this might attract the ants, therefore I find that this kapur ajaib is really ajaib. By the next morning I wake up with an ant-less coffee mug! Tapi kadang2 ada la jugak semut kebal yang masih boleh membolosi benteng pertahanan by kapur ajaib. Hence, I draw 2 circles encircling my mug a.k.a double fortification!

Strong enough to break

Problems are queuing up a beeline. After one another, waiting for their turn to punch out and break this metalized-heart and squeezed out my dried-out tear pool. I've been living with troubles and tribulations throughout my years here. Its just too much! Too much but yet I'm still standing. I have to!

These trials are just too cruel for me to bear. The hardship has no merci and its pouring like a tsunami. I can't believe that this is happening to me… all what I've planned and dream of are casting out, just like that! All these hard work and headaches chasing over datelines means nothing, nothing at all!!!

Help – is not in their dictionary, tolerance – is a very extraordinary, lenience – is only for their benefit, lembap – nombor satu, money – is everything!

MIRACLE is all I need right now.

Oh Allah, if this can't be any lighter for me to abide,

at least make me stronger and show me ways to be optimistic for whatever reason it has to be.

Grant me, with at least something.

Something that is as good as what I can't get.

Dekan Cup Champion A.G.A.I.N

It has been a long day. Perhaps today is the earliest day since I don't-know-when. Everything went smoothly and… Alhamdulillah my batch won the cup. AGAIN!!!
wEee!!

Not to mention about gaining the title of big time winner over our so-hard-work victory, its such an euphoric! Everyone shed their tears of joy. Perhaps our final year of being together as the batch of 2005. Oh guys, aren't we so great or what?! Hahaha!

Here I dedicate to all my fellow friends with NIM that begins with 051071- our winning theme song, my all time favourite – Jai Ho (PCD version)

Amid all the joy, laughter and happiness, one that I encroached on me the most was towards the end of the day when we asked a stranger to snap a photo of us, instead of counting to three, she said 'Bismillahirahmanirahim' and click on the shutter. OMG, that was the first time I ever heard of such… hmm… well, I'm impressed!!! And I know we all were holding our laugh at that time.

Divergence of the filthy rich and smutty poor

Last Sunday, I went for a program called Bakti Sosial or what we called it Baksos (it's a trend to make shortforms of everything here…). It was totally sponsored by us the Malaysian students and was instructed with some help from one of the club in our faculty (they help us mainly in the sense of arranging agendas, finding suitable village in the rural community which we can help, and communications). Outline of the program were 'pengobatan gratis' where the seniors were to give conscientious medical check up, and the not-so-senior to prepare the medication while the juniors with the physical examination and vital checks. Besides that we had a 'pembagian sembako' where we give out staple victuals such as rice, sugar, salt and such.

The Baksos went smooth and fine and I had fun. But that was not actually the main point of me writing this entry.

Looking at these Indonesians (excluding my classmates, lecturers and those who are close to me), I see poverty. They may categorized themselves as 'not rich' but I pathetically see scarceness which I am tired of feeling sorry. It has been four years, and my sympathy has fade by time…

seeing these very hardworking men with well built muscles and yet under nutritious,
seeing mothers carrying their kids walk for miles in their almost worn-out slippers,
seeing painstaking jobs that are meant for machines but been done by men,
seeing starving children being fed with i-don't-want-to-know-what,
seeing family of five riding on a bushed-out motorcycle,
seeing man pulling burden 100 times of their bodyweight,
seeing people desperately open up my garbage looking for stuff to recycle,
seeing handicaps crawling on the road and others just don't seem to bother,
seeing beggars trying to act out their most sympathetic face everywhere,
seeing children running after public transport to sing for money,
seeing girls trying to fit in the 'latest' fashion by wearing oh-so-wrong but yet so hip for them,
seeing boys trying to grow up with cigars in between their fingers,
seeing hunching and dying old men still working and carrying out burdens on their back,
seeing people giving up their health over the littlest wealth, like punching a needle-sized hole to breath, and keep breathing…

and yet, on the other scene I see…

almost everyone in my class equipped with at least a megapixel camera phone,
and must have laptop,
and other gadgets – blackberry, DSLR, PSP, ipods, etc…,
driving Japanese/European fine-made mobiles,
or at least superbike and first-rate motorbikes,
">with at least a maid or two at home,
even drivers,
though most of them carry plagiarized LV handbags (like I don't know~) but still…,
tailoring 50k worth wedding dress,
getting monthly spa treatment,
having grand parties, wedding ceremonies, etc.,

Ah, I better stop listing all these pitiable things which has become a cliché – divergence of the filthy rich and smutty poor, and although tritely clear seen in our hackneyed life but not quite perceived by their reckless mind. God knows what is there hindering them to actually grasp the situation of where they are in. Its all about luck and power here. Again, I am sick these super-distinctive phenomenon. And I am tired of considering another sympathy…

While at the Baksos, seeing the ladies and children reminds me of the maids back at home.

All the maids in Malaysia (and construction workers too), I warn you to be thankful of what is given or back to this hell where you belong! Jangan nak mengada2, I know exactly how poverty your life was and how desperate of you actually! WORK! Jgn malas!!! Jangan nak lari pulak! (p/s: those with maids who are mentally retard and cannot read, please read this out loud to them. If they refuse to kneel, inform ME! I'll give them direct lesson for F.O.C!)

Minus the snout

[ music mode : I just can't get enough – The Saturdays ]

How do I start this? (OMG, I lost the sense of blogging already!!)

First of all, I've been eating like a p!9 since I woke up approximately 4:45 am this morning (too early eh? I got exam at 7 and had to leave the house at 6, hope it explains). First start with a big bowl of cereal mixture of cornflakes, honeystars and kokocrunch. Oh did I mentioned that I love to buy boxes of cereals and mixed them together? Oh and of course I flood them all with an overflow cold low-fat milk. Btw, low-fat milk doesn't make me less fatter. I just love the way they named it 'low-fat' however – make me enjoy gulfing without guilt. Then I had a bottle of Yakult. Even the lactobacillus don't work well for my digestion. There is just something wrong with my digestive system! I just hope that I don't inherit anything from my late grandpa who died of carcinoma colon a.k.a cancer of intestine!

After class, 'exam' I mean, I hurried back home just in time to drop by the market. Bought vegetables and tempe altogether worth Rp15000. Got home and help myself with omelet enriched with smoked beef and a bowl of spinach. Few minutes after the plates are cleared, I opt for a piece of bread with chocolate spread and boil some water for a mug of hot chocolate. As usual, hot coco comes in pair with biscuits. Currently, I'm sucking strawberry-crème flavored Chupa chup given by kak Nuzul, and it came with a 'touching' message too! Lol!! OMG! GemOk geLL~

P.s to Kak Nuzul : I think I'm becoming Mo! Waaaa!

After T* chill-out session

Thank you to two nocturnal creatures (Nadine Mazbar and Kusha) in Malang for de-stressing me and thus making my evening so 'The-Gossip-Girl-like'. I lyokee~

Let me call this my 'after ujian T* celebration'. Been having a tough day since morning still thinking and working on my uncompleted T*. I went all way through all over again from chapter 1-4 in which I did loooong time ago since I projected my proposal. It is so stressing thinking that I haven't done anything, nothing at all for my coming final exams and my UT2 THT which is on this Tuesday. Sometimes, I regretted that I was rushing on things that I wanted to end this T* too soon. I should had just delayed it til after my finals are done. I should had just focused on my exams for a little while. However, due to some 'oblige' from someone, I just had to… thank me! :P

Anyway, after hitting my limit for today's stress level, miraculously I had a call from Kak Nad inviting me to go for some chill-out. Awww Nadine Mazbar you're my knight in shining armor! You just knew when I needed for some exuberance in life – especially here, in this place where you really need to psychologically-emphasized the littlest fun that coming your way and just live to enjoy it! I'm happy that there is someone in this 'sacred' land who is actually left for me to have fun with, whom I can see their faces without even thinking that I am a student stranded in Indon.

Kuekuatszu was hot enough, I should be sorry if I missed it. The pool, you know when I last played? No, you don't want to know… Lol!!! Anyhow, the nine-balls was kinda jinx, or was it us? We sure gonna do that again anytime soon so the jinx will diminished by time. I think I still feel the 'depraving aura' on the cue sticks, balls and table. Eeeuu~

Next, we gotta find some place for our Gossip-girl session better than Warung Subuh! And don't forget our fitness plan!

Have to hit the bed now… too bad I'm not yet a nocturnal creature or I would have stayed to enjoy the McD breakfast with you girls. It's 3:43am??!!

To be done

Allow me to puke

*buaarggghhhh weerrrkkkk uuwaaaarrrkkkk uurkk urkkk (and all the vomiting sound you could think of)

I've been facing nose-to-nose with this one particular thing for weeks, oh no, months actually and it just got worse and even worse than worse. This one particular thing is nothing unusual, but my thesis.

Aarrgghhh!! I can just go ballistic seeing/hearing/pronouncing the word 'thesis'!!! Tolongggg I'm all wacky, and please please pretty please end all this torment ASAP before I become a thesisphobic.

My definition is definitely right! This country is a jinx, it's undonesia!

T* (I can't finished typing the word) has been an unbearable mission (which I amazingly seems to bear with it after all) throughout these 2 years. I've been climbing slowly with the researches and experiments and… today I reached the climax of all of it – I finally presented my research, Alhamdulillah everything went smooth and great *senyum skit*

However there are still sequences of revision following which I have to complete within this 2 weeks. Kan dah kata… belum siap lagi! UNDONE yet u know~ takper… relax (paleotak la nak relax!).

So, about my presentation this morning… I really thank Dr. Sudjari big time for being such super supportive consultant. I can never thank him enough, he has done a lot for me and backed me up ultimately especially today. Not only that he helped me explaining the unnecessary absurdity that the examiners had, but he profusely convinced the examiners on my righteous, how dedicated I was throughout the exploration and everything! Awww… I was truly touched!

About my examiner (the one on my previous post), I gotta thank him after all for being very perfectionist and thus make my writings flawless. He is super perfect that he didn't even missed to check a single full stop, comma, and things like that. Since he is a pathologist, I think he ran through my writings under the microscope. Hehe!

There is a sentence (spotted by the examiner) in my proposal which I find it quite silly, in which I translated from English into Bahasa Indonesia – "the disease is usually a self-limiting" and I translated it into "penyakit ini biasanya dapat membatasi diri sendiri dan akan sembuh sendiri". I think I was trying to make a little dramatic sentence there but it just didn't work out! Btw, a disease (not an object) don't cure, but patients do cure from a disease.

So now, I'm still on my mission to enriched on my t*. Been Googling and Googling and I guess by the end of the day, I might change my spectacles to goggles thick glasses!

FINAL EXAM is sooooooo around the corner and I have done absolutely nothing about it! Nak studyyyyyyyyy!!! (Bila tgh busy, tibe2 time tu rasa rajin nak study plak! Kejamnya perasaan ini…)

*tibe2 rasa nak demam* (SERIOUS okay~)

Tomorrow

Accidentally missed peds class this morning. After obgyn which ended 30 minutes earlier, I went to the Pathology Anatomy lab in the hospital main building to meet my examiner. Apparently there wasn't really any specific reason to meet him, but I just feel like I had to. To get him familiar with my face just in case he got too mesmerized by me tomorrow in the meeting room. Haha yea right. Not really~ I went to dug out some inquiries (if there is any) from him, just in case he might asked me certain challenging questions concerning my research.

Expectedly, he gave me another tickle to my urinary vesicle that made me feel like peeing in my pants!
Waduh, soalnya dok, gimanaaaa gituh!

This laptop seems to be like a magic eight ball that I rely on to give me the answers to his questions. Nevertheless, the questions were meticulously detailed that only logic mind can confer, I'm tired of finding references to prove to my belief a.k.a jawapan hentam. I ran off (naik angkut I mean..) to campus to meet my consultant for some ideas about the questions, he didn't really helped much, however he gave me ideas on how I can speak my way out to of the 'decoy'.

Will be practicing on my presentation, voice intonation, hand movements, eye and body contacts and yea… bahasa Indonesia! I'll be talking alone all the way to bed tonight! Good luck Bil!!!

For mama & papa...

The grin

I was walking down the aisle in between the parasitology and pharmacology lab, making my way up to the office where I supposed to register my thesis. I thoroughly make my-signature-wide-steps brisk walk through the aisle as I was chasing over the envious time. Once I reached the entrance of the pharmacology lab, two lads were standing by talking to each other. I recognized one of the guys – plump and has always have this daunting grin on his face, he was one of my classmate who without-any-specific-reason took a long break (whole semester) which resulting him to dropped-out of the class and consequently joined the next class the year after. By mean, he is now my junior.

About this guy

He was one of the earliest Indonesian friends I had since we were in the same 'keluarga PK 2 MABA' (orientation group). I didn't really quite recognized him by then since he was all quiet and passive. But one thing I can remember is that grin on his face, so menacing and it creeps me out everytime he does that. The grin (not mistaken by a smile) is not less different than the It's (the Stephen King's movie – IT) or rather the Batman's Joker. The smirking beam is fully sated by filthy secrets that only he can tell, and is surely one's worth nightmare.

Call me naïve, but it just never runs through my mind to have a different opposite thought of him but just an innocent fat boy who is anxious about the surrounding world and always keep himself low to avoid being intimidated by other friends who have way much confidence. As I heard from almost everyone, as how they have observed and some of their experiences, I gotta believe that my thought of him was entirely wrong. Little did I realized that beneath those filthy fat tissues lies an indecent psyche mind. He is a psychopath!
And that grin, is just the external sign of it.

As time passes by, as lectures and classes and lab practices went on, I started to prove that other people were right, he's not that innocent fat boy anymore. He secretly have impure passions in the opposite sex, and sometimes I caught him sneaking and staring at our female classmates. I started to grow creeps on my skin whenever I see his face. Thank God, we were only in the same class for that hell of first semester.

Back to today

As I walk closer to them, making myself through the entrance, goosebumps started to appear as the hairs were merely erected by fear. I just wished he didn't notice me. But poor me, he did. The second I passed him, I realized the quick turned of his head without moving his neck,

he looked at me and confidently said "Nabilah"

and not forgotten, the grin!

Oh my god! How the hell can he still remember my name!!! !@#%$^&* I replied him with a fidgety grin and accelerate my feet up to the office…

About 1 hour later, I finally made my way home. Switched on the TV, grabbed a Buavita lychee juice and throw myself helplessly on the couch. As I was watching "Wizard of Waverly Place" on Disney Channel, my handphone rang. That's odd. I barely get any phone calls at this hour, it was from an unknown number. I picked it up with my curious voice and heard a man's voice over. The line wasn't all clear so we had to repeat back everything said.

"Ini siapa?" (repeated several times)

")!(@*#$&%&^!" (still not clear of what is spoken)

In between the noise of unclear speech, I suddenly heard a word that definitely turned the fright out of me. The very word is a name (a name to be kept confidential).

WHATTHA?!!! (I thought to myself) could this be HIM who called me?! Where the hell did he get my number from?! I am so going to kill someone for this!

After few seconds of a fretful angst and anxiety, I finally heard him clearly. Phew~ no, it was not 'HIM'… it was someone else who shares the same name as him. Hahaha that's freaking funny!

Anyway, that man of the same name as the psychopath brought me some terrible news about my thesis. My presentation time is clashed with someone else's and either one of us have to re-scheduled. Done with that, and I re-scheduled mine to 30 minutes earlier than scheduled, its just that I have to go all round again and informed everyone who is going to be involved. Sabar… sabar…~

Last but not least, I finally set the date for my thesis's examination. I'll be presenting my 2 years of research on this Thursday, 4^th June 2009 at 9am. Wish me luck! *wink*