That swigging squiggling wax coated cancerous thing

There was only a cup of tea and a piece of toast with butter and kaya on the dining table when I woke up this morning. Breakfast has always been my very most important meal and I won’t start my day without stuffing myself in the morning. Mama takes a day off from work today. So practically, I was forced to wake up and help her cleaning the house. After a few chores which include ‘water the plant’ and used all the energy I got from the single butter and kaya toast, I get back into the kitchen and dig out for something to eat.

span >Raiding the fridge but not to vail, I turned to the cabinets and found packets of Maggie!!! OMG, I miss that s***!!! I thought that I won’t be scoffing such nasty food like that once I’m home, hence I just miss having those swigging-squiggling-wax-coated cancerous noodles with MSG enriched seasoning powder (omg, I make that sound so deadly unhealthy) – that’s my breakfast for today *wink*. Surprisingly, mama didn’t say a word about me having Maggie (she just hate seeing her kids scoffing on instant noodles and would definitely pull her nagging trigger).

Talking about ‘water the plant’, that’s one of the new house chores just introduced since I-don’t-know-when. According to Tok Puan, one of her simple gardening tips is to ‘talk to the plant’, basically have some monologue conversation with the plants. But since I wasn’t much in the mood of watering them and of course didn’t know what exactly to talk to them.

I just went like “So… Good morning pokok2 sekalian.. You guys need some water huh?”.

Angah heard me, and she replied in behalf of the plants, but I don’t think plants know how to use the obscene words she used, thus we didn’t really get into the ‘talking to the plants mood’.

Friends For Sale

The spotlight for today is definitely on the meeting with my business buddies. I’ve gotta blog it!

This is another party of friends I’m keeping in my treasure chest – definitely. The meeting (shall I call it meeting or gathering or just a simple hang out? Maybe it was meeting at first since we’re ‘business dealers’, but then I prefer it to be called ‘hang out’) was planned way months before since their first meet up (without me), so I urged them for another hang out during my holiday. Thanks for the effort guys! The Carbonara Party was a blast, the suggested Carbonara was scrumptious (better than Italiannies, really!) and definitely will have it again!!!

The hours of hanging out at Centerpoint was solidified with talks over wide range of topics, lotsa poses for the flashes of cameras, and not forgotten the remarkably unamplified loud laughs!!! These are the people I love to hang out with, just like my other bunch of friends, we get along very well as how we meant to be.

Maybe this will answered to Am question on my opinion about the carbonara party, or basically about them. Honestly, I didn’t feel any wide range of age gap there in between us though we might be like at least 8 years different. Thanks to Nad who is willingly rushed from the long day she had on the flight back from Miri and her fashionably busy life. I can’t imagine the party without her, she’s so damn freakingly hilarious!!! She’s an amazing woman, I mean it. I wonder how Shareen is… must be a real havoc with them both at the site. As told by Am “Luckily she was not there”. Not that lucky though, Am was just being spontaneous, not that he meant it.

Jason is a nice man, just like a friendly uncle who is motivational and yet funny. Being a great businessman he is, mainly he’s the game planner of our TeamSwaf FFS business. About Am, haha. How am I suppose to write about you? You’re as nice as how I expected you to be. You actually laugh quite a lot uh? Mesti you dah kena inject with laughing allergents from Nad! And Man, I remembered meeting you five years back! Not much different uh? Still friendly, but I still think that you should have finished up the last shrimp!

Thanks to Dd to be on my company over the evening!!! I pray you’ll get the scholar to Japan, and then we’ll meet you there in Kimonos and Nad will do her Step Up dance (just like how she did in front of her boss! LOL).

Overall, this evening was a blast! Despite of the cancellation of our midnight surprise party to Dyen (due to the bad traffic condition in Shah Alam after the Malaysia-Chelsea football match, we’re terribly sorry Dyen!!! But I’m sure you’re having extra good time with Oc). I can’t wait to watch The Secrets which Jason passed to everyone of us (how sweet eh?). They were talking about The Secrets (that everyone was talking about), I wanted to read that since Zaidi bragged me on how good the book was, but I’m just not the type of person who actually read books (except for studies), and here’s a good opportunity for me to get into The Secret on dvd *wink*.

Dr. Fish Therapy

I’ve always wanted to try this and been planning for it with the girls since… my last holiday. Supposedly, the girls spa-out should be on the last weekend, but since I was away to JB, the plan has to be put on hold.

I woke up today with congested nose and teary eyes. Damn hate this flu! After a few house chores, I got ready to meet Zhaf. Yay, I was right on time, he didn’t have to wait!!!

According to my holiday-diet-regime, I have to be more lenient to myself (not so strict), allowing myself to eat just anything and everything but with a lot of concern on my weight (how is this?). Despite of having a scrumptious breakfast at the Old Town Kopitiam, I allowed myself a double kaya and butter toast but with plain warm water. So, I saved some calories on the drinks.

Since we have about one and a half hour before Zhaf had to hit down to work, we drove off to Subang Parade for what they called the ‘Fish Spa’! According to the pamphlet, it says that the fish has no teeth, but I felt the micro-biting on my soles. At first it was like “Eeuuu” and “aarr!! hahhahaa” and “Geli geli geli geli!!!!”. After all, it was a good treat! It’s worth a try!

Eh chup! why do you have to charge us when we're helping you feeding the fish with our dead skins??!! tak aci!!!

Shop Out Loud!

Waking up after six hours of sleep and still hanging around with this slushy-morning look. Should be the acute dumbfound effect of my current status as a bankruptcy and a hopeless student. How I wish to have a job and earn a good pay, then I can really feel the ‘shop til drop’ sensation. As for now, despite of the declaration of bankruptcy, the showy effect hasn’t gotten into an ostentatious bizarre yet. I wonder how I would spend my wages for my shopping list of no-ending-no-edges.

Yesterday shoes were a big mistake! I shouldn’t have worn the high heels if I knew that we would go walking around the BB from Pavilion all the way to Low Yatt (surveying new laptop for Renee). It wouldn’t be a big problem if I was in a different pair of shoes. Though these legs are made for shopping, but they still need appropriate accessories, don’t they?

Pavilion was… typically Pavilion, I have nothing against it and hopefully to come back when I got my pocket topped up (like… in how many years?). But something keeps me wondering still – could ‘he’ (referring to a particular someone) be in a bipolar disorder or schizophrenia when he swap over RM1500 for a simple shirt??! Damn, I would rather spent that for the madly bundle sale on MNG or Topshop or anywhere else where I can get ten times more goods than the one from Gucci. Oops…

Outing with Renee was a reminiscing of the good school days, and shopping with Amirol was a drop-dead-heels-cracking moment, didn’t know that guys are as fanatical shoppers as the girls~ He proved it twice this week (the first time was on the random shopping trip to Sunway Pyramid last Monday). Renee and I were suppose to be his so-called ‘shopping consultants’ however were knocked for six over his wild-and-senseless shopping intuition. I seriously got a heart attack in spite of a slight hypoglycemic on that quick shopping before we finally get to fuel up at Planet Hollywood. Phew… fresh air! Fresh air!

Happy 31st Wedding Anniversary to Mama & Papa!!!

I love you both so much!!

Blogging on bed

I seldom do this. I always make bed as a special place to rest or to sleep and nothing more. As how much I cherish sleep, I still have these two irritating dark rings encircling my eyes. That’s one of the reasons why I went to look for a suitable facial treatment this evening. Even Leonard Drake (Demalogica) and Beaubelle don’t have the treatment I’m searching for, maybe Dr. Ranjit has it! (What treatment? – ada deh~)

Since I came back, I never set the morning alarm. Mmmm… nikmatnya tidur~ but as usual, Zhaf, being a devoted sunshine to my morning window, will call me up. I had date today! I rushed up and remember that papa is supposed to eat oats every morning (as it is believed to reduce cholesterol). OMG, his cholesterol level is terribly high!!! After reading his medical check-up reports from the SJMC, it comes to my concern that papa needs to do something about it! The medical report looks like a list report from random cases in the IPD exam paper. Scary!!!

Being typically me, Zhaf had to wait at least 15 minutes upon his arrival as I was busy upstairs preparing myself. Got my little ‘possessions’ stuffed in an over-sized bag, then we were off to mamak for a little breakfast. Mid Valley seems to be our only choice to catch Journey to the Center of The Earth on 3D effect. The movie was good, nothing special about the 3D effect except that it’s a 3D! hehehe

I thought that Eman and Nadh would be in MV by the time our movie ended, then I got a sms from Nadh telling that they are all in KLCC. What a coincidence! Zhaf and I initially planned to go to KLCC too after settling few of his stuff somewhere around KL.

Lama gila tunggu Nadh and Eman from their Educative trip to the Petrosains. Taktau mimpi ape sampai nak pegi petrosains. Didn’t get to spend much time with them, coz Zhaf wanted to get out of KL before the road gets busy. The sophisticated roads and highway make the journey from KLCC to Subang Parade as quick as walking from my house to SMSU. Thank you to all the brilliant civil engineers and labors! Cheers!

Taste wise, I can’t differentiate J.co donuts and Big Apple. I love both!!!

Since I already put this Beaubelle's facial serum and moisturizer (which are meant to be put up before sleep), it is appropiate for me to be on bed and sleep. Now that I am already on the bed, and blogged about it... so now it's time to dozzed off! night!

Nothing beats Hanson

Stress!!! Stress!!!

Who the hell are Jonas Brothers??!!
Not only that the media labeled them as the ‘Second Hanson’, the three brothers even sound like Hanson!!! The way they sing… I can mistake their voice for Taylor Hanson.

*pulling my hair and shout out loud*

Why the hell do they put a big stress in me?! Of course they are!!! I hate it when there are such pathetic individuals trying to be like Hanson, imitate their trademarks, be it intentionally or not, I still hate it!! The Mofatts, Jonas Brothers, whatever shit else, I just hate you guys! Sell off the cute faces, inside are all ineptly hopeless!

My brandnew boyfriend

Incited by my mat-salleh celup look (referring to my new hair dye), Zhaf has the affirmation on highlighting his hair too. He was planning for it few months back even before I had my hair done and just got it through yesterday! wEeee!!!

It started with the basic color which is not suppose to be noticeable (but honestly, it is noticeable, but look rather ‘natural’). The highlight came after with a greenish gold which only covered few leashes on his fringe.

There was the 3-long-hour spent at the saloon, getting his new look! (Where the initial plan was just to get a simple haircut actually). The overall cost for his new hairstyle, dye and highlight is as much as my whole semester visit to the saloon in Indonesia (for haircut, hair treatment, reflexology, pedicure, manicure, hairspa and creambath). Hmm… murahnya saloon dkt Indon!

In the end of the day, Zhaf went "Hijaunya rambut I! Oh'o... How am I going to work this Monday? Later orang dkt office sure terkejut". Lol!!! hell yeah with what people going to say or terkejut or whatever~ Actually, takde la hijau sangat... cute ape!

The catching ups

I’m losing sense of blogging. I lost a countless attempt to blog since I came back. Is it because there are just too many to blog? Or maybe there is just no word to describe the raptures.

I’m sick of people asking me “Bil, how’s the food in Indon? Best eh?”

Why the heck do they care about the foods in Indo? Basically, the hidden gist was on me, the question is not asked upon their curiosity about the food. I get it… I’m fat – fatter. How polite Malaysians are – the question to get to the point of my fatness is so refined into a more sophisticated sentence. I don’t mind frankness and I totally appreciate honesty, no matter how hurtful it is.

Mama is back! Her shopping vacation seems exciting enough, but not as electrifying as how she was after came back from Milan. I miss mama, tomorrow is the starting of

“bangun, bangun!!! Anak dara apa ni tidur sampai tengah hari!”

and I’m kinda miss it actually *sigh*

I had my second nasi ayam and first nasi lemak today. Ouch, so much nasi for this week I guess. I met most of the people I’ve been missing while I’m gone. Started with lunch at McD after Friday prayer with Renee, Jo and Ogy. Caught up with gossips and Lol-ing with the forever hilarious Jo. Guess how much I missed Renee… then later this evening, Adli came and fetch me for the typical taiti-at-kopitiam session. Almost the whole bunch were there, Ossie, Dyen, Hafidz... and Amirol who just arrived KLIA at 9:30pm from Sydney, straight away drop by the kopitiam with all the kangaroo’s smell still and his huge baggage. Pelik betul… balik je terus kopitiam, bukan nak balik rumah dulu. Hahaha. Enough of winning 2 sets, the lucks were more to Adli tonight. Aww… this is what I’ve been missing.

I’m missing Zhaf (still). Haven’t got enough of him yet (I guess I will never be). He is one addictive substance, my happy pill, my cheery machine, my lucky charm. I wonder if I actually ‘miss’ him, cause you ‘miss’ something when you lose it. Whereas, I never lose Zhaf, he’s always near, safely tuck inside my heart – no matter how million miles we are apart. I only miss being physically around him. I don’t mind sleeping at night without having him in my dreams. In spite, he never really came into my dreams at night, or I can count the number of times. I don’t mind either, because he is my every dream come true.

*contented smile*

Sisters go dating

Can you imagine how abruptly the feelings can change? Once you feel so freaking exhausted, then the next day you see outside the window as if the sky was falling, and in the next second you just feel like the whole new world was born and the sun is shining right on you. Life is so unpredictable… full of surprises, no wonder it’s like a box of chocolates.

Let’s just get the piccas to spread the words!!!

Hello home!!!

Good morning Malaysia! The background sound is different, the typical sound I grew up with – the sound of honks, breaks, engines and traffic. I miss this noise, no listening to birds chirping and gossiping outside the window (>> Wake up call), but one thing is missing… mama?! Where’s mama??! Why didn’t she wake me up this morning with her morning alarm

“bangun, bangun! Anak dara apa ni tidur sampai tengah hari”
damn, I miss that!!! (Mama is currently on shopping vacation outside the country) Cepat la balik mama...

Arrived by Maghrib after the longest journey of 3 hours from Malang to Juanda, and 2 and a half hour from Juanda to LCCT. It was quite a restless journey all the way from Malang to Juanda. The driver came picked me up at 10 and he was assuring me that he could get me to Juanda right on time. Before we even get out of Malang, he got a call saying that there was a very bad traffic on the highway since the alternative road to Surabaya is closed, and another alternative road (which has to go through the super crocked and poor condition road) is also closed due to some demonstration of the local community there. He was talking in Bahasa Jawa with that person over the phone, but I could understand, and sensed the worrisome in his voice. While me, pretending to be asleep at the back of the car all sweaty, tensed, panicky and praying profusely, but all I knew was he needs to get me to the airport by 2pm the latest.

Arrived Juanda by 1:34pm (WIB), Alhamdulillah… despite of the long journey, I was just right on time (although the flight was 45 minutes late – biase la Airasia…) Sudoku was my time crasher as I was all alone at the airport. Holding on an express boarding pass made me the only one to board the flight before anyone else, but it was nothing so special as I could only see the maids (@ stewardess) cleaning up the board.

The 2 and a half hour journey was the longest without any company to accelerate voyage.

Depart at 4:45pm (Msia time) and landed safely on the runaway at 7:10pm local time. Zhaf was waiting for me outside the arrival gate. Weee~ hello Malaysia!!! Since I was freaking hungry (only had piece of choc cake and macaroni and cheese at 6am), we straight away to McD before hitting home. I’ve been craving for McD since months before. Had a lot… my portion plus his leftovers portion – all wrapped up nicely in my aired stomach.Home sweet home!!! wEee~ I’m home at last!!!Found 6 pieces of Domino’s Chicken Aloha in the microwave. Makaaaan lagi!! There goes The Awakening of My Eating Monster. Crump up 2 pieces before I found a plate of secret recipe chocolate cake under the tudung saji. OMG! Heaven!!!

Cash from God

God has different ways of answering to prayers. He might answer it straight away, might have response to it a little bit later (so that you’ll learn to pray harder), He might keep His reply later at the very best time on the very best occasion, or sometimes you may feel like He never did reply to your prayers, which He actually keep them, keep em’ til the day after. So that instead of returning your prayers into a certainty, He would sometimes keep em’ and convert the prayers into pahala.

So which one do you prefer? Cash or credit? In whatever way He chose, definitely is the best for us. Trust Him, He’s God.

For so many times in my life, I’ve been given cash from Him (though there are also a-not-yet-replied-prayers, but I have no doubt that there’ll be responses soon). Today, I got cash from God. Praise the Almighty Allah, only He knows how hard the prayers were, how badly I needed it, and how importantly it is to me for an ASAP reply. That’s what called miracle.

It had been a dreadful week since after the exam. I couldn’t feel the relief yet even when the exams were over. Results were bothering me so much, so many possibilities running about my mind and I just couldn’t shut them off. That was the most strenuous week in this semester ever – it was more tiring than exams’ stress, cause you just can’t do anything to ease but prayers and ignorance.

As everyone was anxiously waiting for the IPD and surgery results to be announced yesterday, suddenly the only result announced was Pediatric. Alhamdulillah, one burden lifted. And today, after so many rumors and problems about the surgery & IPD results, they were finally announced around 3 this evening. Again, Alhamdulillah. That was the point I was anxiously waiting for before I could make up my mind whether to fly home tomorrow or wait for the remedial papers. However, since everything went well and not-weird, my excitement of going back home is more than the enthusiasm of studying for remedial papers. Then I started packing up and set my mind, exactly 24 hours before the flight tomorrow.

Ah, what a relief~
It is tiring to think. Do you know that our brain consumes 80% of the energy produced by the body? Just imagine, if you eat a whole chicken, only the flesh from the legs are going to be the energy source to move your whole body except your brain. The weary of worrying about the consequences of uncertainties is the most fatigue and stressful effort ever. Curiosity can kill!

To mama, papa, and everyone out there who had been (and still are) praying for me, thank you so much! I wonder how countless calls Allah received that made Him just couldn’t refuse but to answer… *smile*

So, I guess… will be seeing you tomorrow InsyaAllah.
*BIGGGGG SMILE*

Hello again bacteria!

Today, I re-visit the roadside stalls where I first had my diarrhea from. Depok, that’s what they call it. I don’t know what is so special about that place, shall I say it disgusting? The first time I was bought there, it surprised me. “Do normal people like us actually eat here?!” as I thought that the stalls are meant for cheap labors and carpenters who work nearby.

The lecturers from PPI, practically our facilitators for the adaptation program brought us around the town, little did I realized that they were trying to inject in some active immunization into my body system. They made us had our lunch at such place like that - then was when I experienced my very first terrible diarrhea one day after ‘enjoying’ my meal there. With all the bacteria introduction and immunity formation, they successfully made our adaptation program!!! We are ready to live here and enjoy every junk yet to be served before our eyes.

Talking about getting sick, if it was not due to homesickness, I would very much enjoy being sick under my foster parents’ care (where ibu and her 2 maids will take turn to look after me and give me massage for FOC).

Hello again bacteria I must say! Hairs all on piloerectile, it was somehow like a FearFactor challenge to me when the Indo girls drove us there for lunch. Macam pernah ku lihat tempat ini... Saje nak cari pasal, I refuse to decline the offer. I had the exact same menu I had 3 years back. I wonder if the bacteria are strong enough to fight over my enforced immunity now. Let’s find out - soon!

****

I am so pissed! More than the pissed I should have had if I were not in a dysmenorrheal state. This hormonal imbalance phase I’m going through now is labile and that particular someone was triggering me hard this evening at campus. I hate people who never are grateful for what they’ve got. Dapat B pun nak mengamuk2! If I got a B for the nasty pediatric, I would knee down and pray! Aarrgghh stress!!! I should have gone alone to the campus to check out the results this evening rather than biting the bullets from the trigger she pulled.

Help!!!
This internet service is going to be turned off by the server administrator tomorrow! According to plan, I should go back home on Wednesday. If I failed to, I’ll have to live here, internet-less! Oh noooooooooooo!!!! Nak balik!!!!!!!!!

chup! kan best kalau every exam is like Obgyn remedial paper~

Dalam kotak

Now it gets on my nerves already!
Everything seems to be inside the box. How shallow…

I was discussing with Christina on resuscitation for neonates few minutes ago, I realized that we had lack of references and wanted to dig in some info from the textbooks, then I realized “Oh, I already kept everything in the box and sealed and sent to the new house, urrgh~”, luckily the internet helps a little.

These are sequences of ‘Dah masuk kotak’ episodes :

The blue-tack stuck in between my nails and I couldn’t peel them off. I needed a nail clipper, but “oh wait, it’s sealed in the box already!”

I needed the welfare money but Siti goes like “Alaaaa, I dah simpan smua file dalam kotak dkt rumah baru!!”

“You ada benang and jarum tak? Nak pinjam” and they went like “takde… dah simpan dalam kotak :( “

“Bil, pinjam weight scale”, and I went “Alaaaa, I dah simpan dalam kotak!”

“Bil, you ada tak notes PA? nak pinjam”, and again “Alaaa, dah simpan dalam kotak la… sorry!”

“Bil, may I have a look at your proposal?”, and without doubt “oh sorry, I dah simpan dalam kotak!”

“Do you have any movie yang best2?”, and again and again “Ada, tapi dah masuk dalam kotak. Sorry!”

I was getting ready to the mall this morning, “aik, where are my handbags?!! Where are the bags?! Oh no, I kept everything dalam kotak already!”

And, the latest exasperation happened a few minutes later. I felt as if something fishy was going on down there, oh s***!!
“Kim, you ada pad tak??!” and she went “haaa? Takde… dah simpan dalam kotak la dkt rumah sana… you P ke?! You tak kira ke?”

Daaaaymn...!!!

Now, where is my otak? Dalam kotak???!!!!!!
oh no no no no, kluarkan balik! keluarkan!! besok ada exam!! kena bawak otak!!

Morale of the story :
Do think out of the box, use your otak, before keeping everything dalam kotak!

To Whom It May Concern

This is one of many entries that I am very eager to write. Y’ll know I don’t blog much about other people but this is going to be one special case – this isn’t a gossip, I better call it ‘my point of view’.

Exactly an hour ago, I had bunch of big laughs and giggles and almost break this chair. I found something, some writing, a blog particularly of a very humorous entry, surprisingly. I don’t know whether I should ‘found’ that so-called writing, but I just did… To Whom It May Concern, read this through, and figure if this is about you!

The author of the blog is no stranger to me. I admit that I don’t know her inside out as much as I know other members in our ‘community’, probably because of the age gap, or maybe because she is actually a very secretive person, despite of her visible flamboyant.

She may seem very frank and spontaneous when she talks, as if she let out everything from inside her guts through her mouth. Her words are mostly poignant albeit of her sarcastic-ness, but do no harm (physically) to other people, besides for a temporary personal heartfelt. Sometimes it makes me wonder why she has to behave as such when she knew that it might be defensive for others. Her cynical is sometimes (most of the time) is just unacceptable for such healthy woman her age. Alas, she does not fulfill all the criteria of one healthy individual according to the definition of ‘healthy’ by the WHO. If I were her personal health-adviser, I would refer her to a psychiatrist. No offense, but she needs help. Her condition is not leading to a lethality, but it’s chronic I must say, as I’ve experienced living my whole life swallowing her sardonic words of mocking and disrespect to neither ones’ privacy nor feelings.

It is irritating when I was a small kid and always get bullied by her, calling me by names, ditching me in games, telling me the so-called-truth-that-hurts, making fun of myself, my fats, my teeth, my face, spreading rumors to my friends, embarrass in public, digging into my private life, and do everything that bully does. But as I said, there were just a few temporary heart felt. The pain keeps healing, lucky for me, I have a strong mental to hold me through my life as a kid, even up til now. If you’ve known her during your childhood, surely you have had at least a little gulp of her sarcastic-ness. I’m sorry that she had to put a little ‘disturbed’ in your growing mental age. If you have watched the movie ‘It’ by Stephen King, well… ~

She, is very thoughtful (actually). You just have to get to know her, deep inside she is loving, caring and most of all very generous. She once was one of my childhood idol, as I thought that she was a very brilliant, smart and creative. Scoring straight A’s for UPSR was really a big deal (as she got a very big bicycle from papa). I admire her creativity, and I must say that we inherited some of the same creative genes and interests. As we both grew older, I can sense of that her sensibility of holding the responsibility of being an adult, of being the eldest above all. I am glad that she has remarkably made herself respectful. Ironically, notwithstanding her blemish attitude she is still eyeing for victims to be fed with tormentor thus satisfy her sarcastic-ness.

To Naufal, be strong, your love life is fully yours.

If Karma exists, and if there is another life after life, I wish you'll be born not to be the eldest daughter, not to have the feeling of being superior among your siblings.

Pick-up truck

First of all, I hate sitting on this chair. My big black chair, my closet, my desk all gone! (moved to the new house). This four-walled cubicle doesn’t look like my room anymore, it doesn’t even feel like the one I lived in for the past 3 years. Yea, three years approximately since I moved into this house around mid of August 2005.

I’ve been waking up early these last few days. The pick-up man with his pick-up truck came right on time. The whole moving took about 3-4 hours, with 2 trips back and forth our old and new place. It is tiring… just moved our stuffs inside, but we’re only moving in after the holiday. For the time being, I’m going to stay here at my current place, use all the electricity, water and other facilities as much as possible as I’ve already paid the rent for the whole month of July.

Extra class for Obgyn was supposed to be after the Friday prayer, which is somewhere around 1pm. In spite of being as busy as lecturers always are, Dr. Sistrosno suddenly had to perform a surgery procedure (Caesarean I reckon…), and rescheduled the class. Postponed til 3pm, but he entered the class when the clock almost strikes four. Three hours delayed (biase la tu… *stoned*), but it is very worth the wait. He entered the class, hold the mic and immediately start without any affable introduction or apologies.

He went like “Hypothalamus, Hypophyse, ovarium… neuroendocrine ada 5 jenis hormone blablabla…”

and without pausing, he continued “jadi, kenapa kalian? Apa masalahnya? Kenapa dgn ujiannya kelmarin?”

Haa, there he goes. If there is nothing wrong with the exam, why must there be an extra class after the exams when we’re all suppose to just go back home and forget about everything?!

Despite the fact of getting the unexpected results for Obgyn, I lose expectations for other subjects too and rely everything on fate and prayers. Surgery and IPD results are coming out this Monday while pediatric’s on the day after – and the fact that my flight back to Malaysia is scheduled on Wednesday the 16th. Everything will be right on time as scheduled if only the-everything-else is right as expected and no weird grades to hold me back here. Although the surgery and pediatric results are not announced yet, but the remedial exams are already fixed! And what is this suppose to mean???! Mesti ramai org dapat markah teruk2, that’s why dah confirm ada remedial papers. Arrghh!!

My anticipation of holiday is fading… I’m starting to curse on the condition of the ‘local’s’ mind here who are so selfish and kiasu. I am going back no matter what, its just that I can’t confirmed when yet. These ‘local’s’ are so lembap taik kucing, taking their own sweet time and procrastinate a lot. They’re taking advantage of being the authority where everyone needs to obey without any protest. Benci!!!

I currently feel like eating satay. Satay kajang particularly. And nasi briyani too… nak balik!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The pseudo-welcoming breeze

I can’t remember the last time I came out from the bathroom without shiver. Pity Kim who has been an ardent ear to my early-morning-whining in bath (since her room is just beside my bathroom). Malang is getting colder these days. July – It’s the chilly season again!

This nippy zephyr is just another reminiscent of my first time arriving Malang. I was expecting it to be so as how it has to be geographically, and what has been told from others.

“Oh, it is really cold here, no kidding” I thought, right when I landed my feet out of the car.

However, the very warm welcome from Ibu Arief compensated it all back and makes me feel cozy in her sweet temperate crib. Aww... bestnya rumah ibu! Feel like going back to her place. I vividly remember that chilly-warm moment in my most lovable foster parents’ house, with all the homesickness aired my heart. For the first time being really away from home, far from family and friends, distance away from Zhaf – it was back then when I felt that Malang at it’s coldest climate.

The new juniors who are coming by this month might feel the same way as how I did (I reckon), and all about this another dimension of the world they’ve yet to explore. It is not always this cold, the weather can be really scorching hot sometimes, therefore don’t be cheated by this pseudo-welcoming breeze, and it is just the prelude of so much more crazy weather around here as time goes by.

Whole day full

7:00 am : Hanson started singing ‘Get up and Go’ on my handphone. I didn’t think much before I put them on snooze and get back to sleep. Five minutes later I heard “Biiiiilll, banguuun”, Siti shouted from inside the TV room.

“Yea, it’s today, it’s going to be one long exhausting day and it’s going to start now!”

7:15 am : I finally got up and straight away to the bath. Jaya still in her PJs, Kimah hasn’t gotten her breakfast yet. But, I thought we’re suppose to get going by 7am!!! *stoned*

8:00 am : we finally got out of the house, took the angkut and off to the immigration office. The ride wasn’t as long as it used to be, psychologically cause we were chatting and enjoying the whole 40minutes ride.

Nothing much happened at the immigration office, everything went smooth since they’ve shifted the counter for foreign on the 1st floor. I never thought that they have such smart brains to finally separate the place for us from the frantic waiting room with all the TKIs (tenaga kerja Indonesia) and their funny smell. Got our ERP (exit re-entry permit), and head back to our next destination.

10:05 am : arrived at the hospital. So, which department first? IPD? Obgyn? Surgery?
The IPD secretary was holding on stalk of papers when we arrived, she then frenziedly fold the papers into two and kept them aside as soon as we asked her whether if can check our results.

“nilainya jueelek!! Masih juelllleeek ga bisa dikeluarkan dulu”

Right, we’re very aware of that expression and it didn’t surprise us at all. All of us expected the ‘jelek-ness’, IPD was an absolute bizarre. After much arguing, she still refused to hand us our results as there are still few procedures the department has to go through, with all the revision, conference with all the lecturers and all. My hope to sit for the remedial paper is slimming, as thin and fragile as the hymen membrane (euu, what a description!)

Then we went to the surgery department. The results are already brought up to the faculty, but still on pending, waiting for approval before they can finally be published. I wonder why they have to hold on the results for so long.

About Obgyn, there was no mistake in the grading. I am really that dumb!
DONE at the hospital with heartache, headache and exhaustion.

11:00 am : head to our new house. We’re moving in tomorrow, so today is the cleaning up day. We washed and scrubbed the whole house til 3:30pm.

4:00 pm : Arrived at the faculty. Head to the lab and found that all my mosquitoes are dead! Damn!!! even 5% concentration of mint can kill those nasty creatures. Means that I’ve to dilute the extract to a lower concentration and check out the potential.
Arrrghh, tensionnya harini! Luck envies me so much it seems. I wasted my energy to just check out the deadly mosquitoes.

4:40 pm : Home finally… phew~ rush for Asar and ready for Maghrib. I wonder how can the guys next door know my name?! nasib baik dah nak pindah...

6:30 pm : Have to ditch the Korean TV series this evening and continue packing my stuff.

7:35 pm : Bibi from Bali called. Again, asking me when I’m going back to go surfing in Bali. Hmm… sorry, I’m busy.

I really think that if there is one district in Indonesia that has to dismiss from the region, it would be Bali.

Bali is far different from other places in Indonesia I’ve visited. I love Bali! Really do!

8:38 pm : Zhaf called. Emotion strikes. I was in my most fatigued and depressing state – and being the most reliable guy, he dug out the optimist side of myself and cheered me up. Problems seem to disappear all of sudden. Thanks darling!

10:43 pm : Papa called. Emotional rushed once again. I told him about the whole day of heartache and all my problems, tears started to swift out like a monsoon drain. I don’t know why I can be so much emotional when talking to my parents, only they have the key to my lacrimal glands and it irritatingly triggers me much. Being the most supportive, understanding and lovable parents they are, tears dried off and my problems are all settled! Thanks papa! I don't know how I'd do without you.

10: 50 pm : Hungryyyy! I just realized that I missed dinner, and didn’t even get a proper lunch. But I didn’t care much, I have to get things done with my room ASAP.

11:00 pm : Done packing, blisters on my right palm and fingers, room is cleaned and bed is calling. Oh, I haven’t prayed yet!

11:30 pm : washed my face and brushed my teeth. Was just about to hit the bed, but the tummy was really upset. Met Angah online, she has ‘gossip’ to tell, and I had something to share. But I suddenly feel like clipping my fingernails. Chat with Angah and just get to know that Zaidi’s family came this morning for ‘merisik’. She got a ring, I wonder if there is a diamond on it.

12:00 am : start blogging, dug in the junk box and found some cookies to munch on. But… I already brushed my teeth??! Hmm… I chewed on some gums with xylitol, it says something like chewing the gum is equivalent to brushing teeth. So I didn’t brush my teeth again after that cookies before drop dead on bed.

12:45 am : done blogging. Going off to bed now.

End (but not quite yet) of 6th sem

Ah, exhausted!
Penat gile!
Cape deh~

Today started at 4:30am, restarted at 6:30am. Begin with an icy cold bath followed by few complications in reading Pancasila. The notes stack is as thick as the yellowpages (okay, im exaggerating here), full of writing, but I yet feel ‘empty’, my mind was numbing and I just couldn’t take it anymore. Got enough of reading the dreary notes, I took my lab coat and my experiment apparatus all packed up in the bag. I off to campus one hour before the exam started. Just because I thought that I could do something more meaningful with that time. I went to defrost my mint extract and reminded Mas Budi about the Culex sp. I’m about to use right after the exam.

Panca-what?! I got stuck at question 2b and the answer for question 3b and 3c were more or less the same. At least I wrote quite a long essay, as if I was blogging on the paper for the whole question no.1, hope it helps. It’s not fair that the international class juniors got to do their Pancasila exam in open-book, while us, we have to read and absorb every ramble that we never can understand.

Astaghfirullahalazim… is this my Obgyn results? I re-check twice, and yes it is! How can this be happening? I didn’t expect to get that shitty, the exam wasn’t so tough though. Is this some kind of mistake or what? But seems like everyone else got shits too. So, are the doctors making a mass destruction with my batch? I hope so, but who knows, I am really that stupid that I deserve it *dumbfounded* (Alhamdulillah there’ll be a remedial for that on Monday)

I got a free lunch today!!! Hehehe
It was a treat by an acquaintance we (me, Zana & Christina) met at the angkut. We met Ibu Henny somewhere early last month on the way back from the hospital. She works at the education department right opposite our campus. As Christina was being friendly to her (me & Zana hardly talk to strangers) and she was being over friendly too, she paid the angkut fare for all of us that time. Oops! We went and met her at her office after the exam (as we know that she would expect us so), then she brought us to the café and treated us all rujak. Hmm… sedap la jugak~

After fully fueled, I went back to the lab and start my experiment. It was 2pm by that then and I knew that I’m going to take long. Therefore, I had to use the musholla (surau) for Zohor and Asar. Guess how much I hated to use the public telekung, but the telekung in Faal lab are all in good condition and comforting.

My exploration for the experiment ended by 5:20pm as I took 2 hours for observation. In the middle of the observation, I could predict some outcome and that resulted me in testing for another concentration.

“Mas, mau nyamuk lagi satu kandang”

and I continued with the 4th trial. I got a few results which I’m not sure if they are significant enough. Need to see my consultant tomorrow and hopefully I can proceed with what I’ve got. The mosquitoes were nasty! Few escaped from the cage and bite me all the way throughout the experiment.
*imagining mode* - the mosquitoes must have some kind of revenge on me

“bad bad girl, what kind of research are you doing that kills us all?! Luckily you have such sweet blood here, I’ll call out my friends for supper on you. HA HA HA”

Thesis update

So far, this is how much I’ve spent for my thesis:
Last sem, Photostat + binding : Rp ±20 000
29th May, Photostat + binding : Rp 23 300
8th June, Mint leaves : Rp 1 650
9th June, Mint leaves : Rp 14 383
25th June, Pulverized mint : Rp 40 000
1st July, Mint extract : Rp 165 000
7th July, small bottle : Rp 2 000
Sprays : Rp 7 500

Mosquitoes use d : 75

The sound I longed for

The sound lingers around my ears (still), little mist hazing about my mind whilst the heart is clouded with a rather confused glee. It’s has been going on like a tinnitus since the past 5 days.

Am I supposed to choose how to feel?
Are emotions arranged on the shelves awaited to be picked?
Are feelings optional?

‘Penny and Me’ – should be the least expected song to be heard over the system of Matos Hypermart. I was jolted, but my lips were visibly moved and sing along. I just couldn’t resist singing along the song I love, especially Hanson songs! Can you believe it? In this place called Malang, the song was tuned over the sound system? For once, I’m glad, for twice, I’m surprised! The same thing happened on the 14th March this year, I was in the car on the way to Surabaya when suddenly ‘Mmmbop’ was tuned over the air! I needed someone to knock on my head, bring me back to reality from the ‘hallucination’ I thought I had.

The feeling was inevitable to get to hear Hanson on the radio for once in a blue moon. Then I remembered, it was Taylor Hanson’s birthday!! But did the Djs know? was that the reason they tuned Mmmbop on on the 14th March?

Panca-what?!

Eeeeeee apakah ini?!! Apa ni????!!!

I promised myself not to go online til I done reading Pancasila. Just one more paper to go and I should go Semangat! Semangat! However, only after less than 30 minutes reading, I already feel so freaking sleepy! This is not the case of STCL (Short-term-concentration-loss), but this is simply because the subject is tedious. In addition to that, the language, the sentences, the words, everything sounds so complicated! It’s almost impossible to interpret the sentences and extract the main points out. Damn absurd!

The words use is verbose and wordy more than Shakespeare could ramble. Some goes like this :

“membangun pranata yang berakarkan nilai dan norma yang menyuburkan persatuan dan kesatuan bangsa”

pranata? akar? subur? ape ni?! are we planting something here? Martha Steward, help!!!

“disintegrasi bangsa dapat terjadi karena adanya konflik vertical dan horizontal serta konflik komunal sebagai akibat tuntutan demokrasi yang melampaui batas, sikap primodialisme bernuansa SARA, konflik antara elite politik, lambatnya pemulihan ekonomi, lemahnya penegakan hokum dan HAM serta kesiapan pelaksanaan Otonomi Daerah”

phewwwww uh uh uh… habis nafas, terbelit2 saraf otak! And still tak faham! And a loootttt more than that!

Aaaa, tak sukenya!!!!

Hassle (and much more to come)

“Mbak Naaaabilah, bubur ayaaam”

Whattha?!!
Pester, stop bugging me when I’m sleeping! With a half-mad-half-annoyed and firmly sealed eyelids, I slipped my hand under the pillow grabbing for my handphone. Damn, its 5:30am, I must have forgotten to set the alarm – again!! Then was when I performed my Subuh, or what some people must have categorized it as ‘Subuh gajah’. Not my fault anyways… Thanks mbah for the wake up call (thought it didn’t sound like a wake up call at all). Again thanks, but no thanks, I really was not in the mood for bubur ayam at times like that. Sleeping seems so much better than eating~

The next scene I could remember after that was when the clock turned 7am, with much hassle and a heart full or reluctance, I dragged my huge self up from bed. Need some laundry and a lot of packing up to do! The plan was to settled on the books and notes by today, and it has been successfully done! Only few notes and books left on the shelves for revision later in case if there’s a remedial exam (oh please, please there be a remedial paper, at least for IPD! Please… pretty pleaseeee!).

Scraping through the jumble of papers and books, I came across these 2 piece of papers – the result of my bonescan test. One test was held in the beginning of last year, and the other was on early this year. There is a diverse between both the results. I’m not sure what unit was used on the measurement, but the first time, my score was 2 (the maximal score for very low risk of osteoporosis), then the second test, my score was slightly lower than 2. My bone density is decreasing within a year and the result is significant!! Oh my god, I’m on the verge of aging… thought it’s still in the ‘low-risk’ category, but still, my bone density is decreasing!!! Damn to those Maggie and caffeine!!!

Talking about bone density, only one carton of milk left in my storage. Obviously it won’t last til the 16th, do I need to get another carton or just let myself milk-less for the rest of the days til I go back home? Oreos are still in a good stock, so do other foods stuff. I must restrict myself for another groceries shopping since I’m running out of cash.

Ten days to go… and still much more to be settled and done. The packing ups and move out is currently the biggest agitation stalking up my mind. I hate packing!!! I wonder how the Nomads live with it. I never have had experienced the chaos of moving into new place before, and I was confused about sorting my stuff into boxes of variety sizes, where sizes and weight come into an important issue. Luckily, I have a ‘Nomad-like’ friend, Siti. Since her dad is a hospital director, the whole family has been shifted from places, and she is well experienced to share a few moving tips with me – my burden seems lighter with her guiding around *wInk*

*scroll up and look* “What a long and monotonous piece this is…”

The A-Rush : Dikejar anjing version

Naughty dog! Bad dog! Stupid dog!!!
I am so going to kill you if killing is not a sin!

So…
That was how it felt… The ‘adrenaline rush’ everyone was talking about, the famous ‘sympathetic reaction’ I learnt since the first semester and the well-known ‘fight or flight reaction’.

Today, subsequently to my seven hours exhaustion of shopping (not exactly shopping, I was just looking for cheap refrigerator and mattress), include few hours of annoying delay of the furniture shop to deliver our beds, and few minutes of waiting for dinner to be cooked, I got chased by a mad dog. Yea, you don’t have to give me those big wide eyes, it’s true, I was chased by a dog!

Just few meters away from home, at the corner where the roads meet, where the junction was a bit creepy at night with bushes and shrubs, that is where it all started. I was still in my painful sandals with a little blister on my left feet at the distal of the 5th metatarsal due to the long-hour-whole-day walked. In a scurry motion, as soon as I started dashing home, a dog came from nowhere, right before my eyes, he was running towards me as if he was chasing after me.

“Damn, what did I do?!”.

To a very shocking moment in my 22 years of living, the world stopped spinning for a millisecond to allow the beginning of the ‘flight or fight reaction’. As the world stopped spinning, the dog did too.

Fight OR flight?
Why must there be an ‘or’? Despite of being a very lousy decision maker, I chose to flight. The dog seemed to have no choice but to abide by my decision. He flight too! There goes the ‘speculated chasing moment’.

I couldn’t feel my feet and my heart was pumping hard (that was the strongest contraction of my cardiac muscle since it was formed during my first few weeks of embryo formation I reckon). I screamed and screeched til I found Nad and Adib walking towards the house. A rapid trip of ideas came up my mind, how far more should I run? What will happen if the dog caught me? Will I get Rabies and admitted into the hospital tonight? My Levi’s jeans, pink HRC shirt I was wearing, Promode sling bag? Everything will be ragged off and torn by the bite of the dog and I’ll have to samak back everything?

“AaAaaAaaAaa Adib! Nad!! Tolongggg!!!”

and I continued speeding up even after I passed them. I realized there was an unidentified guy came out from my house trying to chase the dog away too.
Then I heard Adib and Nad were like “Dah Bil, dah” and then I stopped…
I got my feet back on, but they were so weak. I turned around, no dog, I’m safe, Adib and Nad came towards me, holding my jelly-like figure steadfastly. Then in my half-conscious condition, I saw the unidentified guy (Fala’s friend actually) and few of my housemates with their wide open eyes and mouth wait by the gate – stumbled. Nad took me upstairs.

The vigorous gasp, sweaty palms, pounding heart, skin-tingling sensation, and everything I learnt about the annoying symptoms of sympathetic nerves respond were clearly visible and experienced. In a view of the fact that I was theoretically thought about this so-called ‘A-rush’, I merely memorized all the symptoms exactly before. This incidence however has given me a quick and F.O.C lesson of the sympathetic nerve reaction albeit of a sudden heart attack. I thank god that I was saved! Alhamdulillah…

And, another phenomenon is added today in the Bil’s First-times List. Today, 5th July 2008, first time ever in my life, I got chased by a dog. Though it was only for a few meters (5-6 meters), but the energy consumed for the event was more than a 10k run.

Move it like that

9 papers done, 1 more to go.

Yea, ONE more to go!!! (few remedial to follows…)

I started packing this afternoon, and little did I realized that there are actually tonnes of stuff are junking in my room! I started to sort on the books and lecturer notes, but didn’t quite find any suitable boxes to load the weights. Wanted to pack up the clothes, but I'm afraid if I might want to use them. Wanted to pack up the text books and just seal them up, but I might need them for revision whenever something random pop-up my mind, and besides, I still need to study for the coming remedial papers which are still an uncertainty.

Ideas are on holiday for awhile, mood disappear for the nick of time. Hence no words to dance around with tonight –except for few pictures. Hope these explain a little bit about the 4th July 2008.

And tick tock says the clock

Time is hypocrite.

Now I understand the idioms, the saying, proverb (or whatever you call it) “Time is gold”. Definitely, time is damn filthy rich - but not quite a spoilt brat .

Time rides on a rocket before I could realized its existence,
Time flies on a jet plane when I didn’t want it to go,
Time races on a speedcar when I was trying to chase it,
Time goes down a parade on the luxurious compatible car when I was trying to make ends meet,
Time walks in her stilettos down the road when I was anxiously waiting,
Time slips like a snail when I was in a rush,
Time paralyzed when my adrenaline shot wild!

Time has all mean of transportations and motions that just never fit into my requirement! Everything in this world seems affordable for Time. Time keeps everything and never missed the tiniest microseconds of everything that’s happening, Time never sleeps, not even blink her eyes. Time is strong, Time is not human, neither does she a God. Time is Time… And Time itself.

And the classical tick tock goes, til nobody knows...

Gigi

Teeth have feelings too you know – mine are upset right now. Or could it be my gums instead?
Yes indeed.

I found my toothbrush turned pink when I was brushing this evening. Why??? I am not going to find out the medical explanation on the bleeding manifestation of my gum without any sign of pain. Allow me to be silly this time, albeit of being an all-time silly girl I am, but I think my gum/teeth are upset because I refuse to study/revise on my next paper which is Gimul (a.k.a Gigi & Mulut a.k.a Oral & Co.?). It's freaking tedious alright?!

I can sense the hesitance in my teeth, or perhaps the whole community in my oral cavity - that I don’t love them…

Oh come on, I love you guys!
What do you think that made my parents spends thousands of ringgit for? Not just an aesthetically worth, but for the whole package of healthy and functional teeth I must have. Despite of that, I even had dreamt about my teeth few times in my sleep (actually…)!

So now, don’t I (we : me + my parents) love you enough?

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